Feeling a bit down. And actually, I'm feeling a little bit of "what's the point?" in quitting smoking. Sucks. I don't really know where to go from here. I mean, I don't have a major craving for a cigarette right now, but I just feel shitty. I picked up my friend from the airport yesterday, and we had a great day, and then he told me he doesn't really plan on sticking around, or at least he is sort of thinking of being gone for a long time, and that this is sort of what his life is going to be like.
I'm just bummed. Why quit smoking? Not to be melodramatic, but why do we all have this desire to live to be 100? I don't want to live that long. I'd rather go when I'm 75, before shit really hits the fan. I'm 24 right now. I don't want to do more than another 2/3 of life.
Ick. I'm not digging this person that I am right now. Well, maybe working will help. Then I'll go to the gym, and I'm sure that will help. Then a movie with my dad tonight.
I guess quitting smoking is at least getting away from being controlled by something that is killing me. And hey, I suppose that's a pretty big deal.
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